I think most of you know by now that I'm not big on giving advice. These are some bits though, some pearls, if you will, of wisdom that I don't feel comfortable keeping to myself.
I'm a giver.
1. Don't buy a baking magazine based purely on the pretty cover photo of cupcakes. The magazine may be from the UK with confusing measurements and terminology.
2. Don't assume that you're smart enough to just do the conversions in your head. You're not.
There are all kinds of nifty conversion charts online.
3. If cupcakes look inherently wrong when still in the batter stage, they will most likely look (and taste) just as wrong when they are baked. Or wronger. (Sorry, but in my head this is SO a word).
4. Don't ever assume your dog is smarter than a skunk.
5. Don't ever assume you're smarter than your dog.
6. No matter what the ads say, the So Slimming Jeans from Chico's will not make you look like you're actually a size 4. They lie.
7. Don't go to the doctor unless you want to hear about all the things that are wrong with you.
8. Don't feel like you need to share all your self-diagnoses with your doctor. He'll pretend to listen, but generally he'll think you're a nut. If you've been going to him for 20 years or more, he'll most likely feel free to share that with you... the nut thing.
9. You can practice every day for years by singing in front of the mirror using a perfume bottle as a microphone and still not sound good. Or even look like you sound good.
10. Be sure to cut off the little strappy-things they put on shirts to hold them on the hangers. If you don't you may:
a. Wear them hanging out of your arm holes all day.
or
b. Wear them hanging out of your arm holes all day and then get one caught on a display rack at a fancy store and subsequently pull the rack over onto the floor.
11. Don't even bother trying to explain to the distraught salesperson how 10(b) happened. They will not appreciate your story.
I'm all about making your life easier.
Lu
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